Living in a body that changes all the time

Lilly Gidney
May 6
2 min read

On women's health, identity and learning to adjust

At the moment, I’ve been really noticing how often my body feels different from one day to the next. Not always in a dramatic way, but in small, subtle shifts like how my clothes fit, how much energy I have and how comfortable I feel in myself. Some days everything feels really easy, and I feel really confident, and other days it doesn’t, even if nothing has actually changed.

It’s made me realise how little we talk about the fact that women’s bodies aren’t consistent. They change constantly, often without warning, and yet there’s still this expectation that they should feel the same every day. Look the same, perform the same and respond the same way.

Living in a body that changes means letting go of stability, at least to some extent. There are days when you feel like yourself without thinking about it, and there are other times when things feel slightly off, such as your clothes sitting differently, your mood shifting, and your usual routines feeling harder to keep up with. The changes that women experience during their monthly cycle can be so up and down, making it so difficult to handle.

It’s not always obvious, but it’s enough to notice.

Usually, it's not even about disliking your body, but feeling disconnected from it. It's like you're slightly out of sync with yourself, without ever fully understanding why. It feels so frustrating, especially when there's nothing specific to fix or manage. A woman’s instinct is often to try to get back to a version of yourself that felt more comfortable, but that version isn't always something you can hold onto.

Over time, I think it becomes less about trying to control those changes and more about adjusting to them. That might mean dressing differently depending on how you feel, such as not feeling pressure to wear something uncomfortable just because you feel like you have to. It's also about slowing down when you need to, or letting go of the idea that every day should feel the same.

A lot of the pressure comes from holding onto an idea of how your body should be, such as how it looks on a 'good day' or how it felt at a certain point in time. However, when your body is always changing, that version isn't permanent. It's just one moment. Letting go of that doesn't mean you stop caring at all; it just means you make space for all other versions of yourself in addition to this.